Archive for February, 2008

Chalk this week up to illness. I sat down to finish one of a million articles I’ve started and realized after a few sentences that my effort/general attitude was just weak sauce.  I’ve been bogged down by a horrible flu and it hit me hard this week.  And I wasn’t sitting at home with one of those colds where you are secretly happy because you get to watch movies and catch up on t.v. shows.  I was in pain and only wanted to sleep, but instead of bitching more I’ve caught up on all my shows.  Here is a pretty comprehensive (editor’s note: read sad and lengthy) list of all the shows I watch.  This is actually last times list with new ones added in italics at the end.

I always watch: Real World, Real World Challenges, Lost, 24, Nip/Tuck, Dirt, White Rapper Show (dead), Maui Fever (dead), Friday Night Lights, Two a Days, The O.C. (show’s over), Ultimate Fighter, Prison Break, Entourage, Rob and Big, Life of Ryan, Scott Baio is 46 and Pregnant, Rock of Love and my new favorite show Making The Band 4 (it’s like Real World mixed with Hollywood, it’s great). 

Occasionally I watch: That 70’s Show, Next, Wire, Girl Next Door, Lost Paradise (I don’t even remember this show), TwentyFour Seven (before it was cancelled), Dawson’s Creek, Soprano’s, Family Guy and Beauty and The Geek, Flavor of Love (I was sick, nothing else was on, I’m sadly caught up).

As always e-mail, text or face (my new abbrev for the book of face) me stuff about the shows and I’ll try to include them in articles or in mailbags.  But, in the meantime, here’s a second set of TV Links. 

Luke from The O.C. has a new gig on Desperate Housewives
http://community.tvguide.com/blog-entry/TVGuide-Editors-Blog/Aus
iello-Report/Ausiello-Scoop-Oc/800034027

Speaking of new roles, Pacey Witter has a new one.
http://www.hollywoodreporter.com/hr/content_display/television/
news/e3i09f751dd163aa411d103fd7009ee39e6 

Yes, Gossip Girl is coming back.  And might even continue into the summer, sweet.
http://www.variety.com/VR1117980756.html

Here’s a list of the rest of the shows that were affected by the strike and when they will resume.
http://community.tvguide.com/blog-entry/TVGuide-Edit
ors-Blog/Ausiello-Report/Wga-Strike-Favorite/8000326
98?loc=interstitialskip

A Real World Award Show? Really?
http://www.broadcastingcable.com/blog/1380000138
/post/940021694.html

It looks like Friday Night Lights is probably getting cancelled.  But, there is a website that’s trying to save it.
http://www.savefridaynightlights.tv/

Never watched the show Vegas.  But, I heard good things.  I guess it got cancelled.
http://community.tvguide.com/blog-entry/TVGuide-Editors-Blog/Ausiell
o-Report/Ausiello-Scoop-Las/800034137

Blair from Gossip Girl is working on a CD.  I’m a sucker for pop music.
http://www.ctv.ca/servlet/ArticleNews/show/CTVShows/2008022
2/meester_music_080222/20080222/

Articles about Cougars (which I’ve referenced many times before) kill me. Now I stuble upon a Boston Globe article talking about how Cougars are taking over T.V.  Hilarious I tell you.
http://www.boston.com/ae/media/articles/2008/02/23/on_the_prowl/

Probably the most talked about person on my website.  Similar to me a ridiculousness cloud finds his body and follows him around every night he drinks.  Then the cloud starts storming and his blacked out ass will start fights with men or women.  Lived with him for two years in college.  Has a hot younger sister, who I might wife one day.  He has red hair.  His girlfriend/wife has red hair.  They’re pathetically cute together.  And, he genuinely loves her, but fucking degrades himself as a man for the pussy shit he says to her (will be an article one day).  Back to the hair subject, one time in preparation for his girlfriend coming in town decided while hammered to start trimming his pubes.  Fucked up and the rest is history as he left no hair remaining and had a pubic region resembling a newborns.  Probably most importantly deserves huge props for implementing the word minx into my vocabulary.  Currently, living up his senior year at the University of Iowa and I’m assuming moving back to the cities for some finance job for the rest of his life. 

Drinking Ability: Almost rivals me (9)
Ability to get Ass: Wifed himself too early, or this number could have been boosted (gots booze as a great notch though) (6)
Smartassness: Nah. (4)
Ability to make others laugh: We tell stories well. (7)
Text Messaging Skills: Dunno (5)
Streetsmarts: Weighted down by his drunken decision making skills (yet he’s never lost a fight or got arrested). (6)
Booksmarts: Quite Smart and tries hard, great combo (8)
VideogameAbilities: Average Player (5)
FantasySkills: The one time he tried, he traded for all hometown players, lame. (3)
Likely to be a good parent one day?: Yeah, he’s got Litz’s blood. (7)
Overall Rating as a Person Based on this Scale: 6.0

This article first appeared December 8, 2006.

Really?

I understand that question makes no sense without a preface, but I felt like starting it that way.  If I google my name (Michael Moller, only writing it in, in the hope that it now appears on google), my website doesn’t even come up.  How the hell does that work.  And yet people who think about abusing little children can stumble upon my website.  That just doesn’t seem fair.  Why should someone who is a fuckhead (yes these types of dirtballs exist) deserve to read my shit, just because I have a unique title to my website?  But, yet someone who cares enough to google my name doesn’t  have the privilage of reading my rivagulous stories.  Makes no sense. 

Thanks to the TheTabloidsChic I have new Hills news.  It returns March 24th.  Here’s the preview:

http://www.mtv.com/overdrive/?id=1581858&vid=211039

I don’t know about you, but that looks so different from our casual Hills.  That looks like it’s turning into an actual scripted show.  Oh wait, that happened months ago.  What I’m trying to say is how awesome does that preview look.  But, the thing I love about the preview is how well made and well done it is.  Mock the show all you want, but as a non fan even this preview looks solid.  Also, how funny is it that another random dude is seducing a girl on the show (Lauren) due to accent alone.  Listen to how bad he butchers Eiffel Tower, it’s comical.  And no, that’s not how the French say it.  He’s just trying to pulls some tail.  Let me know, when you want someone to use a Danish accent. Justin Bobby is back, YES.  Whitney tells Lisa Love she is quitting, YES.  Lo, is shown in the previews, RALF.  Lauren is jealous that Brody has a girlfriend, HAHA LC.  ShePratt is in a class with LC, they go to class?, HILARIOUS nonetheless.  But, honestly the odds of that happening are 1 in 10,000.  That’s one of the most scripted things they’ve ever done.  That’s not possible without them intentionally setting it up like that. 

LC needs to stop trying to control Audrina like she’s her fucking puppet.  LC to Audrina “did she (Heidi) come in here and like chill?.”  I mean I know she was nothing before you came along, but now she’s almost more likeable, I mean she did find Justin Bobby.  Spencer and Heidi is just getting old.  Let them break up, so I can see playboy Spence again.  Speaking of Spence, I agree with him getting mad at ShePratt.  Honestly, how the hell does ShePratt try to befriend LC?  She clearly has a few screws loose. 

Turns out, I lied there’s a fake 10-17 sentence article today.  Don’t feel like counting, gave myself a solid range.  

This is absolutely 100% confidently sure of this my best writing state.  I understand that makes no sense, nor do the thoughts in my mind (editor: that’s an incomplete sentence).  But, that’s why these thoughts are fun.  Fun was the easy, simple, quick word there.  Only three letters, expressed how I felt.  Just got the job done.

Alll I want to do is stockpile articles right now on any topic and let me ramble about them drunk.  Alright, fuck it, here’s an idea, I want people to send me links, article ideas, questions, send me anything and I’m going to ramble about it.  Get it to me a.s.a.p. as I will probably be ordering food soon and maybe alleviating my hangover. 

P.S. Don’t make them comments like TKM.  Either facebook message them to me or e-mail me them, like most people do.

Sorry, for commenting too early. I wanted to wait until it was 25 minutes. Gut (you missed the letter B, and yes you might be developing one, unless you start working out more than twice a week) I just finished reading an article about Hermoine. Don’t ask me why, she’s not hot. The inner Bomber in me just thought her current hookup looked pedophile-esque and wanted to read more.

Here’s the link if you want a boring read and a picture of a guy who looks like a clown (read the lead singer of a band).
http://entertainment.msn.com/movies/hotgossip/2-20-0
8?GT1=7701&silentchk=1&

Editor: Do you realize you are carrying on a conversation with yourself? Not to mention, I’m not even real, I’m a version of yourself.

Author: Yes I do, what’s your point?

Editor: My point is, shouldn’t you have done this on a day when people actually read and comment on your articles. Monday through Thursday bring in much more reaction than Friday. Do yourself a favor and start a new article before you waste the little wittiness (yeah, I’m making words up, who’s going to edit me, BITCH) that you have.

Author: Point well taken. Normally, I like to take the upper hand on you, Mr. Editor, but you did well.

P.S. Don’t ever call me a bitch again. I can fire you whenever I want and hire a new editor.