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Text Message Log 15
Posted by: admin0
Under: Text Message Log
31 Dec 2007
31 Dec 2007
Fritzagizard - One pull, two pull, three pull, four - drink my booze and youll be sick no more. 5:06 p.m. 11/30/07
-Where did you steal that line from? Sounds like something you’d read on a spring break t-shirt.
D - Happy world aids day!!! 
10:12 a.m. 12/1/07
-Didn’t know they had one
Boobins - Scotty doesnt know. 10:09 p.m. 12/1/07
-I haven’t heard that song in forever. I remember the good old days when I use to wake my college roommates up to tailgate by blaring that song.
HogginBoy - I have a clear picture in my head of kinky kong jerkin it and buckets of splooge landing on the dude. 12:43 a.m. 12/2/07
HogginBoy - Good thing us humans don’t splooge that much. 12:47 a.m. 12/2/07
-Kinky Kong was on T.V. so I felt obligated to text Hoggin. It’s a soft core porn HogginBoy loved.
TwinKidMan - I just was officer finneran, remember him? 12:50 p.m. 12/2/07
-Absofuckinglutely. The last time I saw him I got him hammered. Always fun getting a cop plowed.
ToadCock - That guy should just retire…sick move. 1:57 p.m. 12/2/07
-When AD made Kennoy Kennedy look like he was playing pop warner football.
EvilFather - Ughggggg u work so late. 5:40 p.m. 12/3/07
-You’re telling me. Fucking Mondays.
ToadCock - Really? No better ending. 10:47 p.m. 12/3/07
-I love watching the Patriots. I love their 52-7 victories. I even love it when they only win by 1 yard.
PussyDabbler - I hate how pussies drive in the snow. 11:56 a.m. 12/4/07
-I agree with him wholeheartedly. I hate it. But, I did some bitching in response and I’m pretty sure it was karma that my car went into the ditch days later.
ToadCock - Im gonna grind on pussy until my dick falls off…fuck this traffic. 5:46 p.m. 12/4/07
-Jaegger Bombs
D- So ive come to the decision that I want to get ‘rowdy’ for lack of a better term tomorrow evening. 10:25 a.m. 12/6/07
-Rowdy is a great term.
PussyDabbler - I understand anger. 12:22 p.m. 12/6/07
D - Ps your boy SmellsLikeOats and HBomb got engaged! 2:30 p.m. 12/6/07
-Congratufuckinglations guys.
Laura - I was at work so thank god no one i know was there either. 9:53 p.m. 12/6/07
-The one person I know in Omaha was safe. Good to hear.
D - Omg I just saw the funniest thing ever! This fat guy and his even fatter wife walk across the street in the snow to Wendys…they both struggle walking through three inches of snow…and she biffs it! It takes her husband like 5 min to get her up! 2:39 p.m. 12/7/07
-Great visual I had going there.
D - You’re forcing me to start drinking by myself…9:19 p.m. 12/7/07
-Nothing wrong with that, it’s only the first sign of alcoholism.
MiniMiz - Odds that we get fucked up tonight? 9:37 p.m. 12/7/07
-I love this text. We are seperated by hundreds of miles and we’re still on the same page.
MiniMiz - Drunk. 2:29 a.m. 12/8/07
-Congrats
P.S. Hope everyone has a great new years eve tonight. Get rowdy, I know I will be at EvilFather’s sisters wedding. Skol Bitches
(7) Comments
ImPersonAtions and Fake Orgasms
Posted by: admin0
Under: Linking
28 Dec 2007
28 Dec 2007
D sent me this hilarious comedian who does impersonations. My favorites were his John Madden and Robin Williams.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CqN8v5pZC54
TurdBurglar sent me this hilarious video. I have always wondered if people really got hypnotized. But, if you actually faked it and looked like this on stage in front of all your peers I would be quite impressed.
http://www.bebo.com/FlashBox.jsp?FlashBoxId=4229257686
Baby Fucking
Posted by: admin0
Under: Linking
27 Dec 2007
27 Dec 2007
Just a montage of hilarious clips. Some of which you have probably seen before. My favorites are the first and last ones. Milf and TKM I hope you have videos like this. I don’t know if anything can beat baby fucking. That kids got a future in porn.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f_8zXyaTBJY&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f_8zXyaTBJY&feature=related
I fucking miss you and those .500+ records that I grew accustomed to. Currently 3-21 as of submitting this. Hope we lose out. Enjoyed this clip. KG 4 MVP
http://dimemag.com/2007/10/23/kg-the-nature-boy/
Text Message Log 14
Posted by: admin0
Under: Text Message Log
26 Dec 2007
26 Dec 2007
MiniMiz – Uh…The patriots are good. I want to be tom brady. 9:26 p.m. 11/18/07
-Amen brother. Pretty happy that either my Vikes or Pats are going to be Super Bowl champs. I really hope they face each other, that would be fun.
HoJoke – Been a nice run for them but I refuse to turn against my religion. 9:37 p.m. 11/18/07
-His reasons for betting against the Patriots. I love how he described his betting strategy as a religion.
Boobins – My roommate thinks spencer is the devil: “im surprised spencer didn’t start on fire when he walked in that church.” 9:06 p.m. 11/19/07
D – I think you should change your tagline from ‘just loving life…’ to ‘Skol Bitches’ lol. 2:04 p.m. 11/20/07
-I actually like that idea. I mean it is my line and all.
TurdBurglar – That nun is crazy. Boobs rule! 9:26 p.m. 11/20/07
-All nuns are fucking crazy
TurdBurglar – That fake doctor was a Turd Burglar! (Nip/Tuck)
-Too easy.
Version4.0 – I want your cock in my throat. –Eden. 2:08 p.m. 11/21/07
-You just name the place and time Eden.
Version4.0 - Just had to excuse myself from the table to puke four times. 4:54 p.m. 11/22/07
-I’m not even mad.
AllAmerican – Turn off the tv and find your penis. 4:56 p.m. 11/22/07
AllAmerican - Pure garbage, i would rather beat off with sand paper than watch that again. 4:58 p.m. 11/22/07
-In regards to the halftime show during Thanksgiving with Kelly ‘washed up’ Clarkson.
Konvic - U walk like a danish queer. 7:43 p.m. 11/23/07
-For some reason I found this text funny eventhough it’s rather insulting and hopefully not true.
EvilFather - Do u remember the shit show that u were last night? 2:13 p.m. 11/24/07
-Never
EvilFather - Well for starters I asked u guys about 5 million times not to eat in the car, so u decided it would be ok to squirt hot sauce (we went to taco bell) all over MiniMiz and the inside of my mom’s car. 2:15 p.m. 11/24/07
-As Pearl would say, “you’re an asshole.”
ToadCock - I feel like i am with fall out boy in the bathroom. 12:49 a.m. 11/25/07
-No clue what that means.
Fritzagizard/Bomber - Fritze sucks. 1:47 a.m. 11/25/07
-About the most accurate text message I’ve ever received.
NonBloodBro - Please call me asap in the morning . I need to get the f out of here. 4:11 a.m. 11/25/07
-Hilarious text from NonBloodBro after he went home with The Ritter.
D - Ok this is pretty funny…my dad had me convinced all morning that you called my house last night and my dad and you had a long conversation. 11:34 a.m. 11/25/07
ToadCock - This is neat. 2:27 p.m. 11/25/07
-In regards to our Vikings piss pounding Elisha Manning.
JackBauer’sGirl - Yuck-asaurus rex. 4:12 p.m. 11/25/07
D - What kind of watch do you have? 9:37 p.m. 11/25/07
-Skagen bitches. They have baller watches made in Denmark. Sweet party city (Skagen) as well.
JackBauer’sGirl - Remember when your dad got me to pour salt water in my eye. 10:01 a.m. 11/26/07
-Fucking hilarious. He was convinced it would help her pink eye go away.
TurdBurglar - Ew her vag is toxic. Your dick would burn off when you pulled out. 9:42 p.m. 11/27/07
-Never talk like that about my girlfriend Eden.
Boobins - Dream of tornados and babies. 6:24 p.m. 11/29/07
-Haha. http://michaelmoller.com/wordpress/archives/254
Christmas, The Sports Edition
Posted by: admin0
Under: MN Sports Blood
24 Dec 2007
24 Dec 2007
Firstsly and foremostly, Merry Christmas.
Secondly, I’ve never hidden my disdain for that pill popping enigma known as farv (Editers Note: the writer intentionlly spelled Brett Favre wrong because that is how those letters are pronounced). But seriously I was just reading some random articles and fox sports included Brett Favre on a list of the ten best stories of 2007. Joining a list that included Appalachian State’s upset victory, Takeru Kobayashi deep throating abilities, a little league world series walk off homer, and a lady who finished a race with a broken leg. That writer needs to be fired. Farv hasn’t done anything yet. Maybe put him on the list if he wins a Super Bowl, but after just winning a fucking division title, something 25 other professional teams do is bullshit. I mean I understand they had to beat out the best team in football to win the division, but get serious.
http://msn.foxsports.com/nfl/story/7555470?MSNHPHCP>1=10734
Thirdly, speaking of Sports. I would fucking love it if Mayweather became a MMA fighter and joined the UFC.
http://sports.yahoo.com/mma/news;_ylt=AhzDZrGdznN_
8XVdGx3P84M5nYcB?slug=ki-floydmma122207&prov=y
hoo&type=lgns
Fourthly, since every guy loves fantasy football, here’s a good story Bill Simmons told. “By the way, I have the Brian Westbrook story to top all Brian Westbrook stories: I know a high roller who’s in a $100,000-per-person fantasy league — $600K for first place, $300K for second place, $100K for third — and got knocked out of last week’s semifinals by five points. He had Westbrook. I defy anyone to top this story.” Here’s the clip, imagine how pissed you would be, how would you react? Seriously, you’d have to contemplate suicide.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7xgTDJD-tHQ
I wrote all of these articles before my trip. Meaning today, I am praying that my Vikings won last night. And also hoping to hell I was able to to watch the Vikes game last night since it was playing at 2:30 in the morning the day before Christmas. Hopefully, I found a bar that showed it and I didn’t go by myself. If not, I will be watching the game by refreshing my internet explorer for 3+ hours until about 6 in the morning. I love my Vikings. Skol Vikings, Lets Go.
Back with stuff on Wednesday while you guys are off returning all of your Christmas gifts you acted as if you liked.