Archive for October 3rd, 2007

Originally from June 7, 2007.  AllAmerican added the last one to the list and we are looking for any suggestions from people.  This list can be much longer. 

AllAmerican and myself were quite hungover and felt like hell at work a couple days ago after last week’s Wednesday to Sunday all out binge.  We are driving around in a truck when one of us categorizes this girl we met on Saturday as Ugly Hot.  Part hot, part ugly.  From there we decide to entertain ourselves for the next several hours coming up with way too many levels of hotness for girls.  These are in absolutely no particular order.

Ugly Hot… an example would be a Cincinnati Bengal, nice jersey terrible face, glad there’s a helmet shielding it

Flapping in the Wind Hot…a girl that’s been around the block

Damn Near Autistic Hot…meaning dumb as rocks

Chauntay Hot…that whore from Maui Fever, she’s hot, but clearly a whore

Santa Claus Hot…it’s a mystery as to why you find her attractive

Half Case Hot…you know she’s probably not hot, but after a half a case she’s looking at least decent

Nicole Richie Hot… a girl who clearly has either or both an eating disease or drug problem, but regardless of that, you would still probably put your penis in her

DUI Hot…you’d drive drunk to go hook up with her

Formerly Hot…you wish she looks like she did in high school

Star Party Hot…you met her at a dirty ass club, meaning she could be a fucking stripper for all you know

Hope My Friends Don’t Find Out Hot / Moped Hot…quite self explanatory

Won’t Shut Up Hot … this girl needs to stop talking and let her looks just carry her

Lauren Smeins…can’t explain this…AllAmerican, you try for me

Metal Leg Hot … I was clearly hungover and I randomly blurted out Metal Leg Hot because I was building a couch.  Which I then created into a category that means you are probably the only person in the world that thinks this girl is hot

Guilty Pleasure Hot … it probably doesn’t matter what the rest of her looks like, but just because she’s got that one thing you love in girls, you’re naturally attracted

Awkward Hot 
Hot Awkward - don’t remember these two, All American help me out

Boring/Lame Hot … someone who can’t carry on a conversation, which doesn’t matter because guys are shallow

Glad She’s Not My Sister Hot … or else you’d be in prison

Jail Bait Hot … who cares that she’s 17, look at her

Mile Away Hot … she looks good from far, but far from good

First Born Hot … you’d give up your first born child to have a night inside her

Clown Hot … way too much makeup, but it sometimes works

Funky Rug Hot … you’re just praying it’s groomed down there

Socially Awkward Hot … a girl who makes up for her inability to socialize by being a slut

If She Never Talked Again I’d Proably Marry Her Hot … no explanation needed

Cheat on Her Hot … a girlfriend you probably are just using for sex until the next one comes along

Cheat on Her With Hot … the girl that’s hotter than your girlfriend, that is worth ending a relationship for

Wedding Planning after 2 Days Hot … a girl whose hot, but is being way too in love with you way too quickly

Jump On the Grendade Hot … you’re taking one for the team because your friend is about to career it

Justin Timberlake Hot … out of this world hot, meaning only Justin Timberlake could get her.

Id Change my last name Hot - self explanatory