Archive for September 6th, 2007

Thoughts on the season thus far by just breaking down each person after watching the past 3 episodes. 

Cohutta (My Favorite)…Everything about him impresses me.  Hilarious, down to earth, doesn’t give a shit, strangely suave game with women, the clothes he wears, his accident, sincere.  He walks down the street saying hi to strangers after the bars.  He’s such a better person than me, PussyDabbler and myself used to walk down the street after the bars barking at people to try and make them start fights with us.  A bunch of random people come over to ther place after the bars and when he’s sending them off for the night he tells them they are beautiful and have nice asses.  That would never work for a guy that wasn’t that legitimately nice. 

Isaac (Bad/Smart Ass)…Has my favorite line of the season.  After getting ass claimed he needed to “ice his penis down.”  I was not impressed with the girl he hooked up with from some foreign tall land who he was convinced was the best looking girl he had seen in Australia.  Have you opened your eyes and seen your blonde roommates you idiot?  Outside of that he’s clearly the best at making jokes on camera.  So, big boobs falls over and she’s convinced it’s his fault.  As the stubborn fucker he is he refuses to apologize and instead said, “I apologize that gravity works in your disfavor.”  Hilarious and he couldn’t be more right, she’s just a drunk ass GIRL (which says it all).  Then he apologizes for only calling her a slut and says this was a good talk (we always use that line).

Dunbar (So Plain)…Needs to quit leading Parisa on and let her get a reality check.  And how he just did that as I wrote that, good work. 79  The first entertaining thing Dunbar’s done this season.  He went into the confessional drunk (which should be done and shown more often) bitching about Parisa and telling her to read the book in the house called “I’m just not that into you.”  He’s one of those kids thats been the ‘cool kid’ his entire life and expects to always be the one everyone loves.  And now that the girls don’t like Dunbar, he’s turned into an angry tool, this is kind of unintentionally hilarious.  Just cracked open my first beer, it’s my sleeping powder.

Parisa (Hate you)…  Who the fuck writes a letter to tell someone how they feel?  Are we in third grade?  You laugh at the way other people act and then you can’t even tell someone how you feel.  You don’t make sense.  You feel like a toilet bowl that Dunbar likes to shit in?  I’m pretty sure I’m content shitting in just about any fucking toilet bowl, especially if your mouth was that bowl, so then it would shut you the fuck up.

Shauvon (Big Boob Blonde)…Those things are enormous, they never cease to amaze me.  Do you talk?  After these last 2 episodes she has yet to say anything.  You finally talk and it’s about your old boyfriend.  Has she talked about anything else in any episode.  Wow, she’s a zero personality, just a titty fuck.80  ‘You don’t want to talk about it (her ex-bf) because you don’t want to be in a depression mode the whole time your Sydney.’  Those were your exact words and yet that is exactly what you are doing right now.  If it wasn’t for your boobs you could quite easily just be deleted from every scene.  Lastly, why is there a patch on your back?  Do you have scabies or something disgusting like that?

Trisha (Skinny Blonde)…She is a trick.  One of those girls who needs a dick, she has a boyfriend back home but needs some guy telling her how hot she is at all times.  I hate girls that act like this.  However, I love girls that look like this.  She’s also a little backstabber, she’s a prototypical 19 year old girl, extremely immature and acts like a high schooler.  The hot blonde is now flirting up Cohutta, she moved up a notch in my book now.

Kellyann (Whore)…Don’t get me wrong, I would hook up with her, no questions asked.  She just has some serious issues that I’m sure we’ll here about later this season. She would be a minx in the sack while touching my sac.  Haha, she just said she has no feelings for Dunbar, she clearly was into him and was trying to hook up with him in every episode up to this point.  Why did she call her ex-boyfriend just to tell him she scratched a guys back.  Wow, that’s just fucking stupid, dem der are fighting words. 

The biggest question heading forward into this season is which one of the girls is Cohutta going to fuck first?  I think it’s a tough call, but as a betting man I’d pick Kellyann.  I think that whole tease thing is just a cover-up she really loves to fuck.

Side Note 79: Dunbar is so boring I have to talk about something else in his description.  They have a barcelona chair in their place.  Respek

Side Note 80: I’ve only seen the commercials during this show in fast forward due to TiVo.  But, what the hell is Mall World?  It looks so dumb and I have no interest in even wasting 3 minutes figuring it out.